Besides all of the kisses, hugs, snuggles, giggles, squeals, adventures, discoveries and “Momma!!!” I’ve learned that Motherhood has given me so many other incredible gifts.
Being a Momma has taught me the joy of being completely and utterly selfless. First example: The moment you are pregnant, your body isn’t your body any more. When you’re sharing your body with a tiny little angel, the amount of sleep you get, what you eat/ how much McDonald’s you did or didn’t eat at 2AM, how relaxed you are (or aren’t), your activity level, etc. all matters a whole lot! Then suddenly that tiny little angel isn’t in your belly anymore and you think, “My body is finally mine again!!” Wrong. Second example: That tiny little angel is relying on you for all of her appetizers, snacks, 5 course meals, Costco taste testers, and of course desserts. For the first month or two, you are feeding her every 2 hours…the epitomy of selflessness. There are perks though…..for those girls who’ve had zero boobs their whole lives, they finally get to experience what it feels like to fill out that cute V neck sweater and finally have those sweater pups you always dreamed of having. And it’s glorious. Anyway…I got off topic. So, not only are you a milk machine for a tiny little angel and have to be constantly aware of what you are putting into your body, you also can’t leave her side for more than a couple hours at a time. (For those Momma’s who didn’t breastfeed, you’re amazing, and you’re still feeding your tiny little angel every couple hours, which means you still have to be just as selfless). I breastfed Kaia for 13 months. After that ended, I was sad…but also felt like I finally had my freedom back a bit. Wrong. Third example: Toddler-hood. Being selfless is an understatement. Besides making sure she doesn’t eat that moldy dog kibble she found under the oven, or smash her forehead too hard into the wood floor whilst attempting her own (or lack there of) summersault, she needs to know that she is safe and loved 24/7. My time is not my own. The days of dancing in my underwear to Taylor Swift as I polish off half a bag of puffy cheetoes and taking long bubble baths are over (lol who am I kidding…those all still happen…just a whooollle lot less). But those days mostly now consist of running up and down all flights of stairs at a minimum of 500 times a day and making sure the eyes in the back of my head never close (yes, I will be one of those Mom’s that convince my child I really do have eyes in the back of my head and I don’t feel bad about it at all). On top of it all, she watches everything I do like a hawk. That innapropriate dance move she saw Momma do in front of Daddy in the kitchen? Yep..she saw it. She saw the whole thing. I have to be careful. I live in her world now. Would I love to be on my phone looking through the “new arrival’s” on the Nordstrom website pretending I’m going to buy myself something new but knowing I never will because it’ll be covered in questionably sticky fingers within moments of putting it on? Duh, of course. But It’s not fair for me to be on my phone while she’s roaming around trying to find a pair of shoes to lick or an open toilet to drop random artifacts into. In conclusion, my time is not all my own anymore. It probably never will be again- and honestly, it’s the best thing ever. Being selfless is such an incredible gift. It helped me to take a step back from everything in this world, and realize that I have so much to give, and it’s about time I start giving it. Being selfless makes me feel powerful. I have the power to help protect, the power to listen, to learn, to speak up, to be bold, and to slow down and live in the moment.
P.S. My next blogs will be on the other 5 gifts of Motherhood (so far). If I did all 6 in this blog, it’d be waaaaaay too long 🙂